I wish I’d discovered The Fabulous Stains as a teenager. The film itself is pretty entertaining considering the fact that it’s low-budget, features inexperienced actors and took over a year to edit with the ending changed several times! It’s 90% angsty, passionate girl power, 5% cringe and 5% “WTF?” in equal measure.

Diane Lane’s portrayal of scornful teenager Corinne “Third Degree” Burns searching for fame to fill the void in her soul is just breathtaking. The haircut, the sullenness, the unabashed stage presence despite wearing a see-through top and skunk hairdo all combine to make memorable cinematic gold. The storyline itself is completely forgettable, but what I love about the film are the visuals and the cutting moments of dialogue that almost seem profound despite their place in a fim that barely anyone has heard of. I love the way her name almost suggests she’s burnt out or is driven by a heated fury, as if all that’s left in the ashes is her pursuit of fame and music (although granted, her band isn’t exactly musical genius). Some of my favourite quotes include:

• Corinne Burns: He was an old man in a young girl’s world.

• Lawnboy: Everybody wanna to go to Heaven, but nobody wanna die.”

• Corinne Burns: “Every girl should be given an electric guitar on her 16th birthday.”

• Lawnboy: “There’s no difference between me and the next man. I is he and he is I, like I is you and you is me.”

And my favourite…
Corinne Burns: “You don’t fool me for a minute I know all about you. You came here tonight thinking you’d see some cute and wonderful rockstar. And you hoped he’d take one look at you from up on that stage and he’d fall in love with you just like that. Then your saviour could take you out of this dump of a town you live in – you could be different from all the other girls … Suckers! Suckers! Suckers! Suckers! Be yourselves. These guys laugh at you. They got such big plans for the world but they don’t include us. So what does that make you? Just another girl lining up to die. [...] I’m perfect! But nobody in this shithole gets me, because I don’t put out!”